Archive for Me

Love is in the air… or is that the smell of bullshit?

Anyone who has done or tried to do this past holiday acheivement knows, like I do, that this was quite the pain in the ass. “The Love Fool” title seems cool, but at the same time, was it worth it for those of you who got it?

I attempted this one for a few hours, after ending up with around 25 pledges of friendship and 40 or so Grunt Cards, along with assorted arrows and rings etc. I said “Where the FUCK is my pie!?” That’s right, 5 hours of flirting with orcs and running around dealing with trade channel annoyances left me quivering with rage repeating “It’s fop,  Finest in the shop.  Or we have shepherd’s pie peppered with actual shepherd on top. And I’ve just begun…(quote) No pie for Moo. No broken heart either though… Made me wonder. Anyways, after chanting Sweeney Todd pie references and singing “Unbreak my heart! Say you’ll love me again!” every time I heard someone say “Broken Heart, WTB Mend Plz, Org bank!” I decided this achievement was assuredly not for me and commenced attempting to make money off it… didn’t work.

So, what horror stories of this Valentine’s crap fest can you all tell me? Did anyone actually try to log on on V-Day with their significant other around and BS their way around it? Oh, juicy, do tell.

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World of Warcraft Drinking games, bad ideas one and all…

This post is inspired by the mile high hangover caused by wednesday’s “The Ice Stone has melted.” spamathon (I wasn’t on last night, cursed thunderstorms/winds knocked my power out.)

Wipe a shot- Are you doing progression content? Do you desire a little pick-me-up everytime you die horrible to a Void Zone or to a Fire Wall or Malygos kicking your nuts in? Well, welcome to the solution! Organize the game on vent and let the drinking begin. Everytime you wipe, take yourself a shot of your favorite liquor and look forward to death! (Disclaimer: Depending upon the raid, this may be excessive. Please note that in multiple wipe encounters, participation in this game will likely lead to inebriation, more wipes, and eventually alcohol poisoning. If this is likely, please use something less potent than liquor, like… beer)

Battleground Drinking Blitz: Doing a BG? Find grinding BGs boring? Tired of being trounced? Enjoy yourself by taking a drink anytime the other team does something beneficial! Did they just cap the flag? Drink. Did they just knock down yellow? Drink. Did they just cap LM? Drink. Pretty soon you won’t give a shit that your faction sucks on your Battlegroup, hell, you probably won’t remember which faction you’re on! (Disclaimer: If your group sucks, seriously, you might want to switch to having a shot everytime you lose a battleground. It will prevent the stomach pump from coming out.)

And finally, the (now extinct) best drinking game ever! Drinking the Ice Stone: Hey it’s melted right? So that means we can drink it? I’m all out of Ice Stone…hmmm.. I have this whiskey here though. How about I just drink that every time I see that emote come up? Oops, there it is! *Shot* Woo, the Ice Stone replacement Whiskey is strong sh- Wait, it melted again! *Shot* Agh! Okay, now then, I was in the middle of Org with prefume on chatting up a…Hmm, again? *Shot* *Cough* Okay, sho thish herrr guard wash like-un mah perf- … FUCK! How many Aish Shtonesh are thurr!? *Shot* Uh… *thud* (Fastest drinking game ever, oh and yes, it took way more shots than 4 to do it but I don’t feel like typing that much.)

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Guess who’s back

Dear 1.3 readers, the Moo is back. Oh yes, here I am, new and improved. I’m oh so very sorry for not posting in so long, you see, I had things to do… ya know… stuff. Okay, there was someone else 😥 It didn’t mean anything, they were just so new and so incredible. I had fun with them. But I swear, I always knew I would come back, it was just a question of when I had enough time between working and my new mistress… WotLK.

Oh yes, that new expac is a sexy bitch alright. Can’t get enough of JC dailies with a 200 gold reward. Cooking dailies with spices that sell like crack. And get this, stabbing dragons while in flight, trying not to fall or be muched by their jaws! Fuck yeah baby!

But I digress. My post now is to confess. Dear heavenly internet, I have sinned. I have laid down my branches and picked up the fur. I have forsaken by healing heritage, of which I had plenty of since before BC, and now walk the path of the bear. “Gasp” you say? “No” you cry? “Why” you ask?Well friend, I’ll get to that. My guild was as surprised as anyone. But… it’s just fun on bosses now. Lacerate, mangle, maul, swipe, hit your Defender’s code and Monarch Crab and Barkskin at different intervals. Oh yes, it is “the sexy”.

Now, as to “why”… It seems my lot in life to choose the wrong path consistently… I was a PvE Resto Druid in a time when Resto Druids ruled PvP and were at least partially shunned in PvE. I chose to level moonkin, when clearly resto was the best choice. I chose fire as a spec for my mage, right before arcane was announced it’s ridiculous buff. So, it only seems natural that I would choose feral druid and gear myself out right before the armor nerf was announced… God hates me…  So now I have a bear tank just as blizzard is about to nerf the fur off his butt. It’s a crying shame.

I don’t want to put a bad light on this, I love the new expac. The content is a little… well… crappy right now. Nax is back but… why? It used to be such an awesome, challenging, cool looking instance. Now it feels like Kara-lite. I feel cheated out of a decent storyline as to why it was removed and is floating in Dragonblight. The instances are fun but consist of AOE fests until bosses, which are then usually easy (though I am convinced the snake boss in H-Gundrak is the hardest single boss in the game right now, Kel and Saph included.) I can hardly wait to see Ulduar and the Sartharion-like content inside like blizz promised us.

I hope your enjoying the content that you’ve had for the last 2 months and I will talk to you again soon. Have a blast in the new content. Unfortunately, I may need to spec back to healer to experience this, as our mitigation is now lower than any tank in the game… Well, at least I didn’t roll a DK.

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Dear Vice Presidential Wannabees…

I have a bone to pick with you both. First, Governor Palin; who the fuck do you think you’re kidding? Do you seriously think you have what it takes to be second in line for the most powerful seat in the world? You were governor of Alaska for what, two years? There have been Republican candidates in the senate that have taken shits longer than that. You’re a publicity stunt. A damned effective one, but one nonetheless. What irritates me about you is your complete lack of comprehension of your own status. You know how Paris Hilton carries a little dog in her purse? You are that dog to John Mccain’s Paris Hilton. Now don’t get me wrong, you’re doing well. You’re smoking hot (well, comparatively) and just plain adorable in small doses. But listening to your “Don’cha’noe” accent for more than a minute or so at a time makes me want to headbutt an infant. The women of America don’t support you because they relate to you or because you hold views they agree with, they support you because you’re pretty and portray a “no-nonsense” attitude. You’d be a perfect character on some show on Oxygen, but VP? I don’t think so.

Dear Senator Biden, you pompous annoying prick. Watching you last night on the debate with Governor Palin got me thinking “Gee, listen to how he talks, he sure is an arrogant bastard.” Do you listen to yourself talk? At least she sounded like a normal human being and not some alien robot from the Planet Shitdontstink. You made the debate more boring than I could have ever imagined. Please, never talk again. Use little cards or speak through Barack but NO MORE TALKING.

Now, I cared about the points raised to a certain point but after 15 minutes I wanted blood. I wanted to see Senator Biden pull the stick out of his ass and bop Governor Palin on her cute little head with it, or see Katie Couric come out wearing nothing but a bikini with a swimming pool of creamed corn and challenge Palin to a wrestling match. Seriously. Please? But no. Instead I get to hear 2 people talk about this and that and establish ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOTHING. They did nothing to help the opinions of voters. Instead, they wasted my Thursday night. You bastards made me miss the second episode of Season 5 of The Office. Every channel had these bastards on it. So instead, I had to concentrate on wiping 3 times on Kaz’rogal due to people not knowing how to RUN THE FUCK AWAY WHEN LOW ON MANA. In retaliation, you two get no votes and I hope you both get hemorrhoids. In the mean time, I’ll be checking out foreign real estate. So long and thanks for all the fish, fuckers.

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WoW Burnout or Sleep Deprivation?

So yesterday I logged on to just mess around and maybe finish up some of those “Champion of the Naaru” quests that I still have. I don’t really need the title, but I’d like to do it just because it’s something to accomplish. Well… I doubt it’ll happen with the patch so close, but that’s beside the point. I logged on after running for 3 days straight with somewhere around 2 hours of sleep a night. I didn’t feel quite “tired” per se, just a little weary and aware that I would need to go to bed at a reasonable time. Then I get a whisper from a guildie, “ZA?”. Now normally I would jump at this oppurtunity. ZAis not only one of my favorite dungeons but we came so close to Bear Mounty goodness last time that I knew we could get it this time. But…. As soon as someone whispered me, I just felt like I got hit by a truck. Literally. Picture sitting at your computer enjoying yourself when for no good reason, you get crotch-punched by your modem and the ceiling falls on your head. That’s about how I felt. Head-achy, tired, sore, and a little constipated (OK, that’s exaggerating a bit). So I let them know, I was too tired tonight and that I didn’t think I could do it. Now… Why the hell would I feel fine one moment and feel like shit the next? It was like the whisper for ZA was a Pavlovian trigger to go to sleep (for those of you that don’t know what Pavlovian means, think dogs, bells, and look up Pavlov. Still don’t know? Too bad, I’m continuing.) But what worries me about that is this: Is it just me being tired or is it that I was so averse to raiding another night (WoW Burnout) that my brain told my body to put on the brakes?

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I fail IRL…

This is a conversation that happened yesterday between me and my fiancee… Judge for yourself.

Moo– [blah blah blah] and then he punched him. El-oh-el.
Ms. Moo– *stare*
Moo– Did I seriously just say el-oh-el?
Ms. Moo– Yeah you did. Is it too late to get our money back for the wedding? Your nerd profile just like quadrupled.
Moo– Shut up. And yes it is too late. I can’t believe I said that.
Ms. Moo– That’s it. No more stupid game for you. I can’t have you talking to someone at the wedding and say “El-oh-el, that was funny”
Moo– Oh no, try and stop me from playing I’ll gank the hell out of you.
Ms. Moo– You’ll what?
Moo– Sonofabitch…
Ms. Moo– Pwned (poned) bitch.

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My pathetic Intro

Well, I couldn’t think of a first post so I guess I’ll introduce myself.

Hi there! Finally after reading months of blog entries for The Big Bear Butt, Doomilius, Parry Dodge Spin, Resto4life, Temerity-Jane, The Part-time Druid, World of Matticus, For the Horde, and a lot more that I just can’t really continue writing about, I decided to make own blog. “Why?” you say, “What could you possibly have to add to the blogging community that has not already been said?” Well, my short answer is…nothing. You are not going to feel smarter for having read my blog, not going to read something so profound that you tear up and weep for joy at my overwhelming wisdom. You are not going to find a bunch of theorycrafting on World of Warcraft
because math makes me a sad panda. I am not going to talk about poop… Another blogger seems to have that covered. What I will post about is… well, everything. If I see something crazy going on in WoW, I may post about it. If I am struck by the sheer stupidity of the human race by yetanother loose-jawed asshat, I’ll most likely post about it. If I get bored and decide I want to post about my opinion of Velveeta Shells and Cheese (which I am hopelessly in love with), I’ll definitely post about it. Unfortunately, I’m most likely going to be irreverant, cynical, and (at times) boring. I may offend you. I may not. If I do, don’t let me know in a “I’m so full of myself, I crapped a clone yesterday” way because I don’t know you and I may get pissy and try to offend you even further. Hopefully, everyone will be happy and my 2 and a half readers will remain un-offended.
First, about myself: My name is Josh. I live in Pittsburgh, PA with myfiancee (wife after June 22) and am an avid Steelers and Penguins fan. I hate the Pirates but that’s because baseball fails to keep my attention for as long as it takes my finger to hit the button on my remote. I decided to start blogging because it looked like fun. I used to write short stories for a hobby and got a few in minor sci-fi mags and things but never really kept at it, but my fiancee wants me to write more often so I figure this
works well as an outlet. Plus, I like to rant and may have to do so on occassion here. I’m a bit cynical of course but not bitterly so. I have a few things that I like very much; food, smoking, drinking, gaming, and WoW. I may post quite a bit about these things in the future but for now I’ll try to keep this WoW related. Speaking of that:

My WoW History: I have 2 70s, one is a 70 Tauren Resto Druid named Moomajick that I’ve had for darn near ever. My other is a 70 NE rogue called Cytiarra. I’ve had 2 accounts hacked and 4 banned (including the two hacked ones) for various offenses (I haven’t cheated or anything, just got into trouble on the other 2 accounts). I’ve been playing the game since about 4 months after release, although I quit for a little while. I used to raid a lot and was in Nax when BC hit but have since toned it down a bit.
My 70 rogue IS a female because I was attempting to get my fiancee to play, failed, and just leveled her myself. I DO beleive that some men would rather stare at a woman toon for hours instead of a male but I believe that the reason I now choose to make female alts once in a while is because they just plain look better in most cases. I also have an extreme hatred (I don’t know why) for Night Elves. It’s odd considering I have one but there’s a special place in my black little heart for (and I’m sorry to any bloggers that might be reading this like BBB) for Night Elf Hunter Any time I see one, I have to kill them. It’s a horrible impulse but I act upon it with glee. More on that later tho.

Naturally, I hope both and a half of you all come back and enjoy this blog, I will try to keep this interesting and not bore you to death. Please, feel free to critique me, I’m gonna need it.

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